A Handful of Conflict Resolution tips that can be used with almost any communication, personality or learning style.

Have you ever witnessed someone stay extremely calm while in the midst of all he$$ breaking loose, a challenge or dealing with a challenging personality?.

Well, most often it’s not by chance, they’ve probably taken time to work on their conflict resolution skills.

As I work with my executive clients, one of the topics that always comes up is; how to manage conflict or challenging people.  I always remind them that it comes down to perception and a handful of other things that I will share below.

What you’ll read below may be a bit prescriptive but, I’m just sharing the goods you apply as needed.

Managing conflict is not about you managing the situation it’s more about you managing yourself during the situation.  Here is what you should keep in mind, and core areas that you should stay in control of.

Your Mindset.

Stay calm and listen.
Ensure you are breathing deeply, not shallow (your brain needs oxygen, especially at this time).
Don’t be quick to judge – we don’t know others are going through. Most of the time people feel unheard.
Don’ act defensively.

What to Focus In the moment.

Acknowledge their concern, repeat what they’ve said.
Do not use unsupportive or, trigger words such as: “calm down, or, be quiet”.
Come from a place of inquiry—and allow them to vent…without becoming defensive.
Don’t return anger with anger, or rudeness with rudeness. (There won’t be ay resolve at all)

Do not say; “I understand”, unless you do.
Say: Tell me more so I can understand better.

Do Say things like:

How can we make this work?
What do you need from me right now?
How can I help?

Body Language Gestures

Tilt your head. When you tilt your head slightly, people feel heard.
Always make eye contact to showcase that you’re paying attention.
Stay away from smiling, many will feel as though you are mocking them and not taking them seriously.

VERY IMPORTANT: Make sure to relieve your own stress after the encounter. Take care of your mental health. I.e. a walk, talk to someone.

This list is not exhaustive in any capacity, but it’s insight on how to manage yourself in the midst of a fire.

What strategies do you use to manage conflict, let me know below.

Coach Karen D